I Would Make a Ghetto Title here, but I Can't Think of One.
by Conspiracynut Feb 18, 2009, 8:29 PM PST
It seems the main villain of this game has been collecting the spirits of horned people throughout the centuries in hopes of using their power to extend her own life. Which works out great for her villagers, because they blame everything from severe draught to rainy days to stubbed toes on any poor sap who is born with pointy sticks on their head. The latest addition her Majesty's collection gets lucky and escapes. On his way out, he meets a barefoot girl in a bird cage (her name is Yorda) and attracts the attention of the Queen's shadowy minions. You have the options of either beating these creatures sensless or letting them take Ms. Languadge Barrier back to the kinkiest teenage bedroom ever. If you choose the latter, you are rewarded by being paralyzed by some sort of bomb the minions left behind while dragging her through a portal in the ground. If the former, then she'll open magic doors for you and you'll do just about everything else for her. Oh, by the way, she's the Queen's daughter and will serve be sacrificed for that immortality I mentioned earlier if you don't escape. Just in case you thought being a princess was all kissing and magic.
